Three Topics to Share, Connected by the Theme of Loss

Three Topics to Share, Connected by the Theme of Loss

We all have to navigate the experience of loss many times in our lives, varying in intensity from minor to traumatic and everything in between. Losses - whether the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, the loss of health, a job, or even a cherished dream - can deeply affect our emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. Our reactions to loss often bring feelings of sadness, anger, confusion, or numbness, and at times can shake a person’s sense of identity or purpose. Even small or unacknowledged losses can accumulate, creating a hidden burden that weighs heavily on the heart. Each loss changes us in some way, inviting us to grieve, to seek healing, and, over time, to discover new meaning or strength on the other side of sorrow.

 

The first thing I want to share is that we are considering the idea of starting a discussion group for those striving to cope with various kinds of losses, offering compassionate listening and spiritual insights that may help in that process. This would not be exclusively a bereavement group, but would include the various types of losses mentioned above. We want to know if there are enough people interested in such a group before scheduling a first meeting. If you would like to see such a group formed, please speak with Fr. Patrick or me, or contact your parish office.

 

The big loss that brought me to write this column is the passing to the Lord of Gertrude “Trudy” Gately - a longtime, faith-filled and faithful woman who has been a very active member of St. Mary Parish and our Plainville-Wrentham Collaborative. From attending Masses throughout the week, praying the Rosary, serving as Communion Minister or Lector, decorating the church or the parish hall, sharing leadership on parish committees, or planning the church picnic, Trudy was always generous with her time and talents. She was a single woman who was very close with extended family & friends, and in many ways made her parish community her family. For me, she was like a big sister or close cousin, saying what needs to be said - at times chiding me, “Looks like it’s time for a haircut, Father Joe,” and other times encouraging and supporting me through the challenges of life. She will be greatly missed around here, but we take consolation that her prayerful and active faith has prepared her well for the banquet of heaven!

 

The other recent losses we experienced at both parishes are much less serious but still a bit sad: we have had to remove a few trees on the property of both parishes. Trees are such a gift from God in many ways - not the least of which is the oxygen they give us to breathe - that we try to avoid reducing the number on our properties, but sometimes removing a few becomes necessary.   A few weeks ago on the St. Martha property, we finally bit the bullet and took down the large tree by the entrance driveway and residence garage. Not only was it growing with all limbs leaning toward the church, but its roots were causing problems with our parking lot storm water drainage. It’s essential that we maximize the drainage around the church to avoid flooding in the church hall, so I reluctantly gave permission to take it down. This week on the St. Mary property, we had several trees removed where the woods meet the back of the parking lot. Some of these were completely dead and decaying (it seems ash trees die frequently around here), and several others were diseased and dying. You may not notice the difference, but we don’t want to risk limbs falling on anyone or your vehicles.

 

We just ordered some new commemorative bricks to honor those who have gone before us as well as joyful events in our lives. If anyone would like to help us plant a new tree to help balance any of these losses, please contact your parish office and we can look into the possibilities together. Many thanks to all of you who provide a listening ear and compassionate support to our brothers and sisters experiencing losses of all kinds. Your prayers and actions have more impact that you know!